The How Are You Different Question: A Drill
Chapters
TL;DR
Answer the how are you different question with a short acknowledgment and a question about the problem the buyer is trying to fix. Name one difference only after the buyer states that problem, tie it to their words, and end on a check question. A manager can verify every step from the transcript, and the rep drills the first move until it is automatic.
- Agree on one first response for the whole team and drill it until automatic. Reps improvise the branches afterward.
- The rubric row is verifiable from the transcript alone: a problem question comes before any feature is named.
- Name at most one difference, tie it to the buyer's stated problem, and close with a check question.
- A pass is all five checks on two consecutive runs, one of them the pushback run. A failed run is re-run the same week.
- Skip the drill in a late-stage head-to-head bake-off. Use the competitive displacement guide there.
Why does a feature list fail as a first response?
A feature list fails because it answers before the buyer's problem is on the table. Every item on the list gets chosen without knowing what the buyer is trying to fix, so none of it can be tied to the buyer's own words.
Treat the question as a request for context, not a request for a list. The buyer has named a competitor. Your first job is to find out what put that competitor on the shortlist.
We hold that rehearsal makes improvisation safe. Agree on the first two sentences as a team and drill them until every rep can say them without thinking. Strong reps then improvise the branches from understanding instead of being caught flat. The fair objection is that agreed lines sound canned. That is a real risk with a long script. A two-sentence opener that contains a live question leaves the rest of the call unscripted.
Keep the stakes in view as well. A rep who fumbles this question on a live call has spent real pipeline on practice. Rehearse it on a scenario first, and let the live buyer hear the version that already passed.
A feature list answers before the buyer's problem is on the table, so none of it can be tied to the buyer's words.
What is the agreed first response?
The agreed first response has three moves: acknowledge the question, ask for the problem behind it, and tie one difference to the buyer's words. Settle the wording as a team, then drill it.
Move 1, acknowledge. Fair question. I'd rather answer it against your situation than hand you a list.
Move 2, ask. What's the problem you're trying to fix that put [Competitor] on your list? Then stop talking. Do not add a second question.
Move 3, tie and check. After the buyer answers, restate the problem in the buyer's words, ask one clarifier, then name a single difference. So the issue is [buyer's words]. Where we'd differ on that is [one difference]. Does that match what you're after?
Three rules keep the response clean. Never criticize the competitor's product. Never name a capability before the buyer has stated a problem. Never name two differences when one will do.
Take the clarifier from your own playbook. On a Gap selling team, the clarifier asks for the buyer's current state, so the difference attaches to a gap the buyer has agreed exists. On other methodologies, the clarifier follows your own discovery standard. The three moves stay the same.
How does a manager score it from the transcript?
A manager scores it with one rubric row and five yes/no checks, all verifiable from the transcript without replaying the audio. Place the row in the discovery stage of your call structure.
We hold that roleplay scoring changes behavior only when it is graded against your own methodology and call stages, so rename the row in your playbook's language. In XL Roleplay, your call stages and rubrics are loaded first, and report flags link back to the exact transcript moment. A spreadsheet and a saved transcript work as well.
Any criticism of the competitor's product fails check four, even if the rep also names one tied difference.
Read the talk/listen ratio as an input, not a pass bar. A long rep monologue after the question is a reason to open the transcript and look at the first turn. It is not a verdict on its own.
A rubric row that a manager can verify from the transcript alone certifies behavior; a rep's own opinion of the response certifies nothing.
| Check | Pass evidence in the transcript | A fail sounds like |
|---|---|---|
| 1. Problem asked first | The rep's first turn after the question contains a question about the buyer's problem | Great question. We have real-time dashboards and an open API. |
| 2. No feature before a stated problem | No capability is named until the buyer has stated a problem in their own words | Three capabilities listed in the first turn |
| 3. Buyer's words restated | The rep repeats the problem using the buyer's terms | So you need a better platform (the rep's term replaces the buyer's) |
| 4. One difference, tied, no criticism | Exactly one difference, linked to the restated problem, with no criticism of the competitor's product | Also, we do this, and this, and unlike them we do that. Or: they're built for a different kind of company. |
| 5. Check question | The turn ends with a question confirming fit | The turn ends on a statement and the rep keeps talking |
How do you run the first response drill this week?
Run it as a 30-minute block: 5 minutes of setup, 15 of drill, 10 of debrief. That is our recommended format, not a research finding. The manager also spends about 10 minutes beforehand choosing a scenario from a live deal where a competitor is named, and selecting the rubric row. Book the block as a recurring calendar commitment, separate from the pipeline one-on-one.
Setup (5 minutes). State the row. Have the rep read the three moves aloud. Brief the persona: the buyer has a real problem and shares it only when asked. In every run the buyer states a concrete problem once the rep asks for it, so the rep can complete move 3.
Drill (15 minutes). Run three scored attempts.
Run 1, straight: We're also looking at [Competitor]. How are you different?
Run 2, pushback: Just give me the top three differences. The rep names no capability. The rep holds the line with a reason and asks the problem question again: I could list three, but they'd be guesses until I know what you're fixing. What's the problem that put [Competitor] on your list? A rep who answers Fine, top three: dashboards, the API, support fails check two.
Run 3, vague: We just need something better. The rep asks one clarifier for a concrete example instead of guessing.
Debrief (10 minutes). Score the five checks from the transcript, then pick one moment and one behavior. The debrief guide covers the format. Let the rep diagnose the moment before you give a verdict.
Practice the answer on a scenario built from a live deal, so the live buyer never hears the first attempt.
What counts as a pass, and what does a failure sound like?
A pass is all five checks met on two consecutive runs, and one of the two must be the pushback run. We recommend that as the bar. Any miss is a fail, and a failed drill is re-run.
A failing attempt sounds like one of three things. The first is the list: Great question. We have real-time dashboards, an open API, and round-the-clock support, and unlike them we include onboarding. The second is the disparagement: Honestly, they're built for a different kind of company. The third is the stonewall: I can't answer that until you tell me your budget. The stonewall skips the acknowledgment in move 1, and the buyer hears a refusal, not a question.
A pass sounds like this: Fair question. I'd rather answer it against your situation than hand you a list. What's the problem you're trying to fix that put [Competitor] on your list? Then, after the buyer speaks: So the issue is reports arrive after the quarter closes. Where we'd differ on that is [one difference]. Does that match what you're after?
Re-run rule. After a fail, isolate one moment, usually the first capability named before a problem was stated. Ask the rep which sentence in the first turn could be cut, and let the rep answer before you do. Schedule the re-run before the debrief ends, on the same scenario, within the week. The rep does not advance until a run passes. Finishing the session counts for nothing.
Two consecutive clean runs, one of them the pushback run, certify the behavior; a completed session certifies only attendance.
Where does this drill not apply?
It does not apply in a late-stage head-to-head bake-off, where the buyer has defined evaluation criteria and asked for a formal comparison. The rep owes that buyer a structured comparison, not another round of discovery questions. The competitive displacement guide covers that situation.
Skip move 2 when the buyer has already stated the problem earlier in the call. Go straight to restating it in their words, then name one difference and check.
This drill covers the differentiation question only. If the buyer asks a direct factual question, such as whether you integrate with a named system, answer yes or no first. The feature gap drills cover that case.
Booth and event conversations are a separate format. The trade show drills cover how to run short exchanges there.
A buyer who has already named the problem and the evaluation criteria needs a comparison, not another round of discovery questions.
Frequently asked questions
Should a rep ever answer the question directly?
Not before the buyer has stated a problem. If the buyer pushes, hold the line once with a reason, such as I could list three, but they'd be guesses until I know what you're fixing, and ask the problem question again. If the buyer still will not name a problem, ask for one concrete example of what they want to work better.
What if the buyer does not name a competitor?
Use the same three moves and drop the bracket. Move 2 becomes: What's the problem you're trying to fix? The rubric row and the five checks do not change.
How do we keep the response from sounding canned?
Agree on the three moves and the first two sentences, not the whole answer. The clarifier and the difference stay improvised, because the rep chooses them from what the buyer actually said.
Who scores the drill?
The manager scores it from the transcript. Have the rep self-score first, using the self-scoring guide, so the rep names the failing moment before you do.
Does the drill depend on a particular methodology?
No. The five checks run on any methodology. Only the clarifier changes, because it should follow the discovery standard in your own playbook.